1 month ago
"Do you ever sit & think what if? What if you had never said the first hello, or what if your paths never crossed? What if you had just five more minutes. What if you could turn back time & make it all stand still. Where would you be? Better? Worse? Less confused? More confused? Happier? Or sadder? Just what if…"
- Daily Relatable Love Quotes (via thelovewhisperer)
1 month ago
1 month ago
"Tell me again was it love at first sight when I walked by and you caught my eyes…"

How can I just let you walk away
Just let you leave without a trace
When I stand here taking every breath with you
You’re the only one who really knew me at all

How can you just walk away from me
When all I can do is watch you leave
Cause we shared the laughter and the pain
And even shared the tears
You’re the only one who really knew me at all

So take a look at me now
Now there’s just an empty space
And there’s nothing left here to remind me
Just a memory of your face

Take a look at me now
There’s just an empty space
And you coming back to me is against the odds
And that’s what I’ve gotta face

I wish I could just make you turn around
Turn around and see me cry
There’s so much I need to say to you
So many reasons why
You’re the only one who really knew me at all

Take a look at me now
Cause I’ll still be standing here
And you coming back to me is against all odds
It’s the chance I’ve gotta take

You take a look at me now…

2 months ago
"I have learned that faith means trusting in advance what will only make sense in reverse."
- Philip Yancey
2 months ago
2 months ago

I didn’t attend funerals that much. It was too sad for me—the lost of beloved ones, the cries and sad faces. I never lost anyone so I wonder how does it feels. How does it feels to be left alone, how long will I remain sad and cry.

And I thought I knew broken heart. Not until one morning when I heard Nenek is dying in the hospital. I prayed God to heal her, and to make me sick instead but He has a different plan. That was when I know how much God loves her. He took her away to heal her. And no words can describe how sad I am but I’m grateful because He ended her pain and took her to the best place instead, on the right side of His throne.

Many people came to Nenek’s funeral and cried. People flew from everywhere to Jakarta just to see her one last time. Of all people I never thought could cry, cried in front of Nenek’s body. That’s just how she left memories to everyone she knew.

There’s this one song that heals my heart after Nenek left. It was one of her favorite too because she always sing it after I wrote her the lyrics.

Bukan dengan kekuatanku

Ku dapat jalani hidupku

Tanpa Tuhan yang di sampingku

Ku tak mampu sendiri

Engkaulah kuatku yang menopangku

Ku pandang wajah-Mu dan berseru

Pertolonganku datang dari-Mu

Peganglah tanganku, jangan lepaskan

Kau lah harapan dalam hidupku

I am thankful for 20 years of my life being taken care of Nenek. For every foods she cooked, every evening tea, every bed time stories, every good deeds she told me to do, and practically everything. And although I never say it often, I know she knew just how thankful I am, and how much I love her.

It’s a good bye for now but it’s just temporary. One day we’ll meet again. One day, we’ll be together again in heaven. So long! 

"You see things. You keep quiet about them and you understand."

Hello! Been a while since last time I wrote. Got busy with school and stuff and didn’t really have time to write but……I finished all my exams and I’m officially having holiday now!

So this is 2014. Lot of things happened last year. I had service at Dec 31st and was thankful to hear preaching that day. It’s true that we, humans, have whatever problems we might have in life. Some might still linger around and we have no idea how to solve them. None of us want problems, and none of us can let ourselves step into tomorrow. How we scared too much to face tomorrow for it will be no different with today, with yesterday. Problems would prolly still there, along with pains.

None of us can walk into a brand new year. God let us so. And He isn’t promising that new year will be a whole new year with no problems and pains in it. It will be so much worse instead. But He said He will be there for us. When life gets hard, you can just turn to Him because He will always be there. He cares that much. He loves you that much.

And so that’s the meaning of new year to me. I might not start new, but I know for sure that He will be there for me. He let me step into this year, He must had created blessings and all beautiful things ahead. Only if I trust Him enough will I see them. Immanuel, that’s His promise, that He is with me always. Happy belated new year everyone!